Home Care Boston providing elderly services in Cambridge, Boston, and Somerville. Call us at 617.557.4600.
Handling an Elder Care Meeting with Ease
Tensions can run high when it comes to discussing elder care options with your family. There are a number of things you can do to make things run more smoothly including:
• Leave out your extended family from the initial meeting. They can be involved in subsequent meetings.
• Lay out some ground rules ahead of time.
• Be respectful and don’t walk out.
• Be clear about what needs to be done and don’t wander from that topic.
• Invite a third part to mediate the conversation.
Make sure you can balance caregiving needs with your own needs and don’t make promises you aren’t sure you can keep. For more information read, “Tips for Family Elder Care Meetings.”
Advance Planning
To prevent caregiver stress it is best to discuss your parents’ needs ahead of time. Some things you may want to bring up include:
• Allow your parents to be in control of how they want to age.
• Get siblings and other family members involved in the conversation.
• Find out where your parents want to live when they get older.
• What nutritional needs aren’t being met? How can you arrange to meet them?
For more information on advance planning read this article. (http://carebuzz.com/tips-family-elder-care-meetings/).
Home Care Boston providing elderly services in Cambridge, Boston, and Somerville. Call us at 617.557.4600.
Are you Being a Perfectionist About Caring for Your Parents?
Certain personality types are extremely independent and feel that the only way to do something right is to do it for themselves. This may be how you feel when it comes to looking after your aging parents. Though your siblings may want to share the responsibility, you may feel that they aren’t equipped to handle it. Keep in mind that dedicating so much time can have adverse effects on your health. Here are something important things to note about primary caregiving:
• Your siblings may feel left out and want to contribute.
• Dedicating your time to caring for your parents could cause a lot of problems in your personal life, like, health problems and spousal or family problems.
• Develop a schedule with your siblings.
• Be specific about how they can help you and how to properly care for your parents.
It could turn out that your siblings do a great job and you may begin to feel more comfortable giving up some of your responsibility. For more information on sharing caregiving responsibilities with your siblings, read this helpguide.
Home Care Boston providing elderly services in Cambridge, Boston, and Somerville. Call us at 617.557.4600.
Living with Your Parents and Lonely?
If you have moved into your elderly parents’ home to care for them, you may be experiencing feelings of loneliness. Spending all your time looking after your parents can isolate your from your peers. You may need to ask your siblings for help and consider the following options:
• Be honest with your siblings.
• Make a list of specific things they could help you with to give yourself a little more free time.
• Ask them to visit more often.
• Set up a Facebook page and get it contact with your friends from the past.
• Invite a friend to dinner.
• Contact a local bookstore to find a book club you could join.
• Check your local newspaper to find out about upcoming events in your community.
• Renew old acquaintances in communities you were a part of.
You may be surprised to find your siblings have no problem lending a hand to help you feel less lonely. If you need more information on fighting the stresses that come with caregiving, check out this help guide.
Home Care Boston providing elderly services in Cambridge, Boston, and Somerville. Call us at 617.557.4600.
Caring for Your Parents While Fighting With Your Siblings
Looking after aging parents can be stressful, especially when you and your siblings don’t agree on what is best for them. Arguing over your parents won’t help anyone out. It will just create tension within a family. If you are the primary caregiver and need help with caring for your parents there are number of methods you can use to show your siblings, that, despite what they might think, you can’t do it alone. These methods include:
• Schedule a meeting where you can sit down and be honest without any arguing.
• Make a list of your parents’ needs and everything you do to meet those needs. Show your siblings the list and tell them you are struggling to get it all done.
• Ask your siblings to recommend their thoughts on how to best assist your parents.
• Try not to be defensive to sibling’s ideas, calmly explain if their ideas are not ideal for your parents.
If you are open, honest and aren’t attacking anyone, you and your siblings should be able to reach some sort of compromise. For more information on elder care, please visit this site.
Home Care Boston providing elderly services in Cambridge, Boston, and Somerville. Call us at 617.557.4600.
Helping Your Parents
As your parents age, they may need your help dealing with all of their responsibilities. When making a decision as to how much help you can offer, don’t bite off more than you can chew. Here are some tips:
• Caring and maintaining for the house.
• Paying bills and arranging doctor’s appointments.
• Selling the house and moving into a care facility.
• Hiring a nurse to visit your parent’s house periodically.
There are number of other ways you can assist your parents. Just be open with them and find out exactly what they need from you.
Taking Action
When it comes to making decisions for your parents, there are a number of factors to consider first. Don’t jump to any one outcome before weighing the pros and cons of each. Here are some tips when it comes to making decisions for your parents.
• Are your parents just overwhelmed? Do they just need reassurance you will be there if they need you?
• Take the point of view of your siblings and group it behind the opinion of your parents’.
• Are you parents capable of making an informed decision?
• Teamwork is the best approach to resolving this dilemma so work together.
If you are feeling overwhelmed by caring for your parents read this help guide for some helpful tips Caregiverstress.com.
While it is the goal of most seniors to remain independent and living at home, this may not always remain a viable option. Some seniors will have to accept help from a caregiver. When this happened, seniors can be involved in the process by having input regarding what services will be needed and who will be assigned as a caregiver. This is known as self-directed care. Below are some tips that will help to assess whether seniors benefit from this program. The issues below will help determine if the senior is actually receiving appropriate elder care planning.
1. Always take the time to ask the senior their views on the situation. Involve family members in these discussions as well. Also be sure to ask the senior if they have any interest in adult daycare programs.
2. Make note of how the senior functions on a daily basis. It is important to know whether they can care for themselves in any way. Some seniors may require minimal assistance, such as with keeping up with laundry or getting to appointments.
3. Be sure that the safety needs of the senior are always being met.
4. It is important to make sure seniors feel safe in their home. Ask them if this is the case. In addition, spiritual beliefs should be supported and social needs tended to. Seniors should not be isolated from the rest of the world just because they are old and may have an illness.
There is a lot at risk when it comes to planning for your parents’ future. In order to make the situation is as easy as possible there are some things you can do. Be sure to communicate with everyone involved and ensure they understand all aspects of any agreement reached. Do your best to focus on building better family relationships.
Questions You May Come Across.
Splitting the workload between your brothers or sisters can be very difficult when it comes to caring for your aging parents. Here are some questions you may come across:
• What is the best way to divide the workload between your siblings?
• How do you reach agreements on important topics with your family?
• What is the best way to build teamwork among your family?
• How do you avoid family conflict?
Important Decisions You Should Talk About With Your Family
There are few important issues you should touch on when making decisions regarding eldercare. These include:
• Family inheritances
• Finances
• End of life issues
• Estate Planning
• Caring for Your Parent
The 50-50 Rule
Splitting the workload evenly between your siblings will help the transition into eldercare go smoothly. If you would like more information on the 50-50 rule check out this helpbook (http://www.caregiverstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/The-50-50-Rule-Helping-Siblings-Overcome-Conflict.pdf).
Home Care Boston providing elderly services in Cambridge, Boston, and Somerville. Call us at 617.557.4600.
Home Care Boston providing elderly services in Cambridge, Boston, and Somerville. Call us at 617.557.4600.
If so, they are not alone. When it comes to discussing potential financial problems, be delicate. Be sure everyone has the same information from your parents to your siblings. Being aware of their financial situation is critical if you want to assist them.
Recession Statistics
Everyone was affected by the recession – including your parents. They could have had a toll taken on their retirement fund. Remind your family they are not alone:
• The Office of the Superintendent of Bankruptcy Canada reported that the share of insolvent consumers for people 55 and up has more than quadrupled in the past two decades.
• According to the Annual Survey of Senior Costs, released by the Senior Citizens League, one quarter of older US adults have lost their buying power.
Options for Financially Assisting Your Parents
There may be a point in time when you will have to assist your parents financially. Here are some potential solutions to financial problems:
• Seek the advice of a financial advisor or lawyer
• Help your parents out now and receive the money back in your inheritance.
• Share all agreements with your siblings and invite them to be part of the agreement as well.
Click here for more information on financially assisting your parents
If bills have started to stack up at your parent’s house or they are starting to worry over having enough saved to retire comfortably, the best thing you can do is talk to them about it. Be sensitive though because money matters can be very private to some people.
Some Tips for Handling Financial Woes
• Discuss every aspect of your parent’s financial situation that they are comfortable sharing.
• Reach a financial agreement everyone is happy with.
• Keep in mind the impact the recession has had on seniors. In Canada, 20.6 percent of seniors filed for bankruptcy in 2009.
• Automatic bill paying is good for seniors who have trouble remembering to get them in on time.
• Maintain a united front with your siblings.
• Ensure everyone understands the problems and the outcomes.
Maintain a Healthy Relationship with your Siblings
No matter what the end result is do your best to come to an agreement everyone is comfortable with. Be sure your siblings are comfortable with the end result since you want to maintain your bonds and not be distracted from your common goal to help your parents.
